Snuggies (Two Pack) + Booklights $16.95

Come on, Dude! I think I'm going bonkers! All you guys seem to think about right now is Christmas!!" Let me tell you.....Mah homie is a pretty cool dude - well, some of the time, if you take right now out of the equation ...



Cos he ain't looking none too pleased at being invited to blow out of our dump "toute suite". Picture this ... his funky vampire tee shirt from The Zombie blah-blah company is covered in the drippings from creme brulee ice-cream, slathered with dark chocolate sauce. Yep! You guessed it. One of the side-effects of vegging out in front of the TV. Yummee, you might say, but not if you could see this Mr. Grumpy in his crumpled, khaki pants. "Hear me out, Dude! Don't you go getting so bent out of shape!! Ah'm not askin' you to get "suited and booted", as our ol' limey friends would say ... just get your ass off the sofa, into the chevy and let's mosey into our downtown movie theatre to see the latest spooky blockbuster - wahoo!!" I can really turn it on, when I'm being persuasive, as you have probably noticed.

Dang! Much to mah surprise, mah meat and potatoes (as well as ice-cream!!) pal has seen the light and is busy cleaning up ready for our downtown sortie. Next thing, we're clambering into the chevy and high-speed motoring all the way along the freeway. After all, we don't want to miss the openers, do we? Well, on arrival at the movie theater car park, there I am attempting to park up and pay for our movie tickets - ain't I a generous guy? - when mah buddy suddenly wigged out on me. "Heck! What are we doing here? This is the most icy cold movie theatre in town! You know this. It's more like a morgue! Ah wanna split and go home!! Ah ain't freezin' ma xxxx off for anyone, pal!" This is when I call upon mah "piece de resistance" ( or something similar!) and reassure mah pal that I ain't about to clip him.

"Lookee here, Dude" as I pull out two of the most warm and snuggly-looking blankets (aptly named Snuggie) you have ever seen with ... Yep! You guessed it ... with sleeves in the most macho, deep royal blue colour and the most feminine pink colour. "You just get yourself covered up and snuggled down with this super-duper blanket (with sleeves) for the movie. How's about that for your first dinky Christmas present from moi?" Well, dudes, ah just wish you could be here to see the xxxx-eating grin on mah pal's face ... he had the last laugh!! His Snuggie was the royal blue one, while I disappeared right under the pink Snuggie. Don't ya sometimes wish you had taken your girl-friend? Don't get me wrong....a Snuggie is a Snuggie no matter what the colour. It is Christmas after all. Go for what you know ...


Product Description

Perfect for:

Traveling in the Car

Night Time Pub Crawls

Chilly Office Buildings

Sporting Events

Cold Movie Theatres

And much, much more!

Available in 2 Great Colours:

Royal Blue
Bright Pink

Your Package includes:

2 Snuggie Blankets at $19.99 each

Plus 2 Book Lights (Free Bonuses)

As Seen On TV Jupiter Jack $8.00

Reading the newspaper, drinking a warm cup of coffee and taking the occasional phone call from a family member or friend - this may sound like a typical Sunday morning for most people but for you, it's the drive to work.

Some may call you a danger to everyone around you as you careen through narrow streets and down the freeway, clipping your fingernails and talking on the phone, but you'd like to think of yourself as an effective "multi-tasker". And let's be honest, besides that one questionable incident on the bridge last year when you decided to alphabetize your CD collection and you ran over something that resembled a person, your driving record is spotless.

You like to be productive wherever you are and that's why you own the Jupiter Jack. The Jupiter Jack allows you to speak on your cell phone hands-free while you drive, or in this morning's case, complete that challenging Sudoku puzzle you've been working on for weeks.

And since you purchased your Jupiter Jack, you've never been more productive in your car. Why just this week you've balanced your checkbook, learned how to fold a perfect origami dove (challenge level 7), gave yourself a pedicure, learned the complete Thriller dance and you can even speak Portuguese fluently!

No longer are you one of those saps that have to use their "hands" to talk on their cell phone while barreling down the road and weaving in and out of traffic - you are a Jupiter Jack man and you've got better things to do with your hands.


Product Description

Jupiter Jack is an easy to use device that turns your car radio into a hands fee speaker phone. It is easy to use. Simply plug Jupiter Jack into your cell phone's headset jack and tune your car radio to 99.3 FM and start talking hands free. It's that simple. Jupiter Jack features a built in microphone that transmits your voice clearly while you hear your caller's voice clearly through your car's speakers.

Using a cell phone without a hands free device may not be sage and is illegal in many states. Now you will enjoy clear robust sound that only your car speaker can provide allowing you to conveniently talk and drive at the same time. Jupiter Jack works with any cell phone with a headphone jack. Some phones may require an adapter, the most common of which are included in the package.


Product Specifications

Easily talk and drive
Adapters Included
Battery Included
Instruction manual enclosed

Jupiter Jack works with any cell phone with a headphone jack. Some phones may require an adapter, the most common of which are included in this package. For those rare cases where the enclosed adapters do not fit your cell phone, we will mail the appropriate adapter to your home for just a small processing fee.

Ed Hardy Energy Shots (5 Pack) $5.00

So, you're chilling at home on a Friday night .. you've poured yourself a liberal sized cup of java .. whilst soothing your aches and pains from a day of incessant office politics intertwined with the antics of your beloved (who has been ignoring you since catching you wearing their underwear) ...

You feel like you were hit by a truck .. your head is pulsating faster than Apple's latest visualization screensaver - you are certain you are going to lift off - but most likely you are only going to land on your bedspread. Maybe a glass of that Chateau Mouton Rothschild that has been collecting dust in your basement would lift your spirits ... or, not. No, you're starting to realize it will only knock you down on your ass even further...

What you need is an IV shot of adrenaline to get yourself going for Uncle Burt's birthday celebration tonight. But, your friendly underground pharmacist is currently sipping Sangria on La Concha beach. So, what is a half-unconscious primate to do? The choice is obvious - you need to unwrap that box which has been sitting underneath your bed for the last month and finally, pull out the most explosive thing north of Kennedy Space Center. It's probably not what you are thinking. (It's not the box with the pink ribbon on it!) No, it's something much better than that - it's a box of Ed Hardy Extra Strength Energy shots. Ooohhhh...

As you delicately unwrap the plastic seal, you slam the shot as if you are still on the high school basketball team. Slam dunk. As you lay down on your coveted loveseat, you feel your brain is kicking in. Now you can count from A to Z in ten seconds and recite "Three Blind Mice" in nine seconds in reverse ... why, you now have the ability to take over the world. Or, at least crawl your way over to see Uncle Burt make a fool of himself. Again...

Just in case .. take an extra bottle with you .. you may need it if your signicant other comes around to make up (at last!). Ed Hardy Energy shots - for the times when you really really need it!


Product Description

Sugar Free
Low Carbs
Serving Size: 2 Fl. Oz / 60 mL
Serving Per Container: 1

Calories 8
Carbohydrates 2g
Sugar 0
Sodium 10mg
Vitamin B1 (as Thiamine) 1.5mg
Niacin 30mg
Vitamin B6 (as Pyridoxine HCI) 40mg
Vitamin B12 (as Cyancobalamin) 500mcg

Proprietary Blend 1600mg
Taurine, Glucoronolactone, Caffeine Anhydrous, Bitter Orange Extract, Citicholine, Magnolia Bark Extract, Green Tea Extract.

Other Ingredients: Purified Water, Glycerin, Erythritol, Citric Acid, Natural and Artificial Flavors, Potassium Sorbate, Sodium Benzoate, Sucralose, FD&C red #40.

Warning: Do not use if you are under 18, pregnant, breast feeding/nursing, have high blood pressure, or any other medical condition. Consult your physician or health care professional before using this product. One serving of this product contains as much caffeine as two cups of coffee. Limit the use of caffeine-containing drugs, foods or beverages while taking this product. Too much caffeine may cause nervousness, dizziness, sleeplessness and irritability. If you experience any headaches or dizziness, please consult a physician or a health care professional. Do not use if the seal has been broken. Keep out of reach of children.

As Seen On TV - Pedi Paws $10.00

Every week you treat yourself to a manicure and pedicure at the exclusive "Time for Toes Salon" so your feet and hands are always ready for the lime light. So why should your dog or cat have to leave the house with those embarrassing nails?

Let's face it, it doesn't matter how cute or cool your cat or dog is. If they've got dry or cracked nails, they will never receive the praise and acceptance that they so desperately seek. In fact, in a recent survey, 64% of dogs said they are "unsatisfied with the current state of their nails".

"Pets experience a myriad of complex emotions that owners may not be aware of," says pet psychologist Cindy McGooberstein, "Many pets experience body image issues and one of the leading causes of pet depression is poor nail care."

As an avid reader of the publication "Dog Fancy" I read a story that captured my heart about a dog named Lucy. Lucy was your ordinary dog - she enjoyed going for walks, taking long naps and terrorizing local children. But slowly Lucy grew more withdrawn and her owners couldn't understand why. Instead of going for a long walk in the park, Lucy chose to binge eat. When she would typically take a long nap on the sofa, she would instead listen to Nirvana alone in the basement and shoot pool.

After weeks of observing this atypical behavior, Lucy's owner took her to their local vet and they were surprised to find out that this change in behavior was entirely due to body image issues, more specifically, paw image issues. Fortunately, all hope was not lost - their vet recommended a product called the PediPaw. In fact, after just one treatment Lucy starting becoming herself again. "We were pleased to see that within only a few days, Lucy was gaining confidence in herself again," said owner Dill Schmitt.

With so much pressure on pets these days to always look perfect, dog and cat confidence is at an all time low. Do something for that special dog or cat in your life, give them the PediPaw and you will give them a reason to smile again.

Product Description

PediPaws is the revolutionary nail trimmer for your dog or cat. It's the newest and fastest way to keep your pet's nails trim rounded and smooth with no mess! Now you can easily trim your pet's nails anywhere without the pain caused by traditional nail clippers. The secret is PediPaws precision emery filing wheel that gently removes thin layers of nail to leave your pet's paws touchably soft and your home safe from scratches. The unique protective cap allows only the perfect amount of nail to be removed and contains all the filings so there's no mess! Start treating your pet like one of the family. You and your pet will love PediPaws!

Features

Revolutionary no-mess, no-pain nail trimmer for both dogs and cats
Precision emery filing wheel gently removes thin layers of nail
Appropriate for dogs and cats of any age or size
Requires 2 C batteries (sold separately)
Unique protective cap contains clipped filings to prevent mess

Digital Photo Frame Keychain $8.00

Dick Cheney, Pfizer and Kate Moss all have something in common.... although what exactly is not clear to us?

You are the reflective type, always digging deeper - never satisifed with the surface dross - rather carefully and patiently dissassembling the superfluous as you keep your sight on the diamonds in the rough. Yes, diamonds are forever. Right? Uh huh. Even drake pays homage to the concept of eternity. Either that - or we are reading too deep into the lyrics.

Either way ... you treat your friends like gold and they treat you back like gold. Enough of the bling bling - we are here to recognize how important your infatuation of the precious elements of life are. Most of the time you can recall what is close to your heart and bring forth memories of these things/people/objects. However, sometimes it is hard to summon a clear image - you might still be stressed that your pet aligator Ben is mourning over the loss of his soul mate Lana. Your clarity of mind has been disturbed as you obsessively attempt to nurture him back to normalcy. Loss is never an easy thing. But, Ben has taken it unusally hard...

You are now a full-time alligator parent. In order to soothe the pain - you decide to take him to Venice to get away from it all. Perhaps a change of scene will allow him to forget Lana. In a rush, you pack your case with all your favorite items ... except one ... your 1978 rodeo alligator boots. Now would not be the right time to bring these ...

As you board your plane - you know you are forgetting something - you ruffle through your pockets. Passport? Check. Chewing gum? Check. Cellphone? Check. $23? Check. Credit card? Check. Keys? Check. Wait .. you grab the keys and notice a silver keychain with a glossy screen staring back at you. As you fumble with the switch - you turn it on and a slideshow of images fly at you. You smile - realizing your significant other has loaded it with images of all the precious things in your life. Kids, Car, Them and that 1978 rodeo catastrophe ... you realize that in the palm of your hand, you have found the diamonds in the rough ...

P.S. The question at the very top was a trick question.

Product Description

Total Pictures: up to 60-70
Picture Formats Accepted: JPEG, BMP, PNG, GIF
Resolution: 96 x 64
Communication Jack: USB 1.1 Cable Included
Power: Built-in 3.7v Lithium
USB Charger Included.
Display: CSTN LCM

Mitsuba HD Camcorder $65.00

Imagine this scenario ... after sending messages back and forth to a beautiful buxom vixen on Facebook, your dream girl finally agrees to going on a date with you Saturday night. You spend your afternoon polishing and waxing your black custom 67' Mustang in preparation ... you pick her up and head down the highway towards Honeymoon Beach, when suddenly the stereo stops working ...


You try to keep your cool, even though you are secretly disappointed that your pre-recorded "mood" CD chock full of Marvin Gaye and Luther Vandross will not be heard by your gorgeous Facebook chick. Not to worry though. You unzip your leather shoulder bag and pull out your Mitsuba HD camera which happens to function equally well as an MP3 player. Last weekend whilst backing up your rare Simpsons signed photo collection to your computer, you recall syncing your iTunes collection to your Mitsuba device. Your heart rate drops down back to normal. After fumbling with the audio output cable, you figure out how to pipe in your latest Al Green album through to the car stereo ... magically it works and Miss. Facebooks expressive smile warms your sullen heart ...

As you pull up to your coveted location on the beach front, you both sit still listening to the waves crash upon each other. The rhythmic pattern causes you to quiver, when you suddenly have the thought that no one will ever believe that you went on the date with this beyond beautiful girl. You remember the Mitsuba device functions as a regular camera. Utilizing the timer function, you huddle up close together and take some snapshots with the leather seating as a backdrop ...

As she grows comfortable nuzzled up to you, you realize that in a moment or two, you might even need the video function to record your much wanted (and perhaps needed) conquest. This is when you are happy that this is not just a regular video camera, but its HD quality! It looks as if the included tripod may not be a useless accessory after all ...

Product Description

Digital Zoom: 8X
LCD Display: 2.5" LTPS Panel
Built-in Flash: Yes
AV in: Yes
MP3 MP4 Player: Yes
Voice Recorder: Yes
PC Cam: Yes
Digital Stabilizer: Yes

Included Accessories

USB Cable
AV Cable
CD Drivers/Guide
LI-ion Battery
User Manual
Tripod Set
Strap
Power Adapter
HDMI Cable
Earphones

QuikCell QThree Bluetooth $20.00

I can still hear those words ringing in ma ears! "If you make another boo-boo with another hooker, you're outta here for good! D'ya hear me, ya two-bit hustler?" ...

We've all been there, buddy. Caught "in flagrante" with a young floozie! There I was in my clunker with this flaky (but well-developed, if ya know what ah mean?) bearcat.......All eyes and mouth......Not me, ya stupid dumbass! We were looking for somewhere to chow down before making whoopee in my old, gnarled but fantabulous '83 Mustang SVO. The offer of a Big Mac ain't well received. This gabby gal ain't settling for anything less than an IHOP favourite, starting with a Rooty-Tooty Fresh 'N Fruity, followed by a Crispy Banana Caramel Cheesecake. Slurrrrrrrp...Slurrrrrp! That's just for starters!

Now I ain't exactly gagging for it, but I certainly ain't getting any younger, so I have to have a game plan to be sure of a good bang for ma buck, if ya follow me, dude. Planning for the next barn-burner requires good timing and ah need the right tools for the bomb, buddy. Me ol' ticker ain't what it used to be....not that I'm a cream puff, but ya have to plan for all eventualities, including the arrival of a wet blanket. Yup! Meaning me other half, of course!

The trouble is, me other half, turns up at IHOP. Boy! She can scarf down as well as you and me, buddy...specially when she cops a load of me and ma bearcat. That Crispy Banana Caramel Cheesecake goes flying past me at the speed of light, with me other half pulling me by the ear and leading me out of the restaurant, screaming in ma lug-hole "If you make another boo-boo........." Well, the rest is history, folks, which brings me to ma latest gadget. It's perfect for those of us who have people to see, places to go and need to keep in touch with our other half...are ya with me? This gizmo is off the charts for the way it gives you total wireless freedom, crystal clear communication and excellent talk time. It's the Quikcell QThree QBluetooth in all its glory......go take a peak!

Product Specification:

Q9400 Bluetooth Headset
AC/DC Power Adapter
Universal Pouch
Heavy Duty Case

8-in-1 Screwdriver Flashlight $10.00

Um, Bob, what time is our launch?" - Wendy asked. The atmosphere was growing quickly, as a mixture of excitement and fear permeated through the air ...

The year is now 2012. December 11th to be precise. We have exactly ten days until the end of the world. The collective consciousness is dancing poetically yet chaotically with streams of differing viewpoints on whether the prophecies are indeed true or not. Thoughts run wild - "is it a grand hoax? did the mayan calendar really exist or not?" - whilst others have passively retired to the comforting thought that we will all return home to our Creator...

And yet others have taken this on as a mission to save the world from extinction - Apocalyse Now style. Will Bruce Willis and our favorite action heros come to our rescue ... were the movies a practice scenario - a peek into our future - secretly training them in the art of war. Sun Tzu style.

Either way - a team of Quantum Physicists and Gravitionational Physicists have been called forth from all corners of the world to be apart of the super secret mission: STW-21-33 . The purpose naturally to ensure survival of the human race ...

Professor. Wendy Shimeburger is in charge of the white space shuttle, which will go to the center of the black hole and attempt to close it using advanced alien technology stolen (excuse me - borrowed) by the US government. Bob Langdon is the pilot. Tom Cruise is assistant navigator. Together they will attempt the improbable ...

As they board the shuttle, the doors close slowly. Pssshhhh... The airtight seal is now locked. Bob turns the ignition. "Stage one" he shouts. The dashboard lights flicker on .. Tom and Wendy reluctantly walk to the leather seats embroidered with a fashionable slogan "We will close the hole" and fasten their belts tightly. Bob presses the shiny red button - "Stage two complete" .. the engines roar into a maelstrom of activity. The vibrations are now moving through the whole shuttle. Wendy smiles as she realizes they will be launching into orbit shortly ...

Bob puts his headset on and issues a command "Everyone hold tight". Tom clutches his knees and looks up at the ceiling - perhaps praying to God. Then suddenly ... hiss ... bang ... boom ... a red alarm light starts flashing .. Bob jumps up and screams "The ECS is not working! Help!". Wendy unbuckles her belt, and pulls out a black phallic shaped device. Tom's eyes light up. She is holding a super advanced flashlight screwdriver. She walks over to the Environmental Control System and turns a few screws - securing the device back into place and suddenly the red alarm light turns back off.

Bob quickly runs up to Wendy and gives her a kiss on her cheek and says "Let's get on with our mission...". To end a long story - the screwdriver did indeed save mankind, as the mission was a complete success. Tom sighs ...

Product Description

Features 8 fold-out screwdrivers with built-in, ultra-bright LED beam.
Integrated wide-beam LED flashlight.
Ideal for repair projects, household chores and emergencies.

When you need the right screwdriver, right within your reach, there's nothing like this handy, '8-in-1' multi-tool. It features eight popular slotted and Phillips driver heads - including a reversible mini-driver - that folds out of the handle for instant use. Plus, it has a built-in, ultra-bright white LED taht focuses light directly on the tool tip for intense pinpoint illumination. And a pro-quality, triple-bulb flashlight that casts a wide, ultra-bright white LED beam - perfect for all sorts of repairs. Durable ABS plastic with 'On/Off' light clip. 2 'AAA' batteries (not included).

Microsoft Wireless 3000 Mouse $20.00

"Welcome to the planet Zog! We know that you earthly humans are not as advanced as we Zogites." ("Very humble words," I thought, "coming from a most unattractive, egg-headed alien!") Anyways, those are only words I thought 'cos looking at those creepy, slanted-eyes, I wasn't going to risk saying anything to upset the first Zogite I have ever encountered...

Yikes! I have one of those feelings that calling a Zogite an airhead could well end up with my being blown out of here in the blinking of an eye.

"Follow me!" commanded the Zogite.

Well, I certainly hope this spacy character isn't jerking me around! Judging by what's behind the sliding glass doors, these Zogites are no rinky-dink aliens. Oh no!! Au contraire, ma eyes are popping out of ma head, buddies, as my peepers are met by one helluva waboosh scene. In front of me is some kinda control room with rows and rows of crystalline desks. Behind the desks are fellow Zogites looking perty smart for ma liking. Yep! I could see Bill Gates serenading the Zogite leaders while saying "That's da bomb, my man...that's da bomb." (Creep-ass!)

There were all these holographic laptops (at least that's what I think the main Zogite geek was saying). Man, they were real cool-looking machines, made of ultra-slim glass with an opaque keyboard and wowee!! The mouse, the mouse was................. Hell! I woke up! There I was, in my couch potato mode, vegging out in front of the Simpsons, when I must have completely racked out. Gee! The funny thing is ... I snoozed with my finger on my new, awesome Microsoft Wireless Mouse 3000. Yup! This is one Mouse that really takes the cake! It's got all the features you want like high definition optical technology, snap-in receiver, wireless freedom ... and much more. This is no snow job, dudes! Go check it out for yourself.

Product Specification

High Definition Optical Technology - more precise and more responsive
Wireless Freedom - stop getting tangled with wires
Snap-in Receiver - plug in snap-in receiver - snap into mouse when yoy travel to preserve battery life
6+ Months Battery Life
Device Stage - quickly and easily access common tasks including product information, registration and settings
Comfortable in Either Hand - designed for ambidextrous use
Designed for Notebook PC's - Compact, comfortable, and designed for convenience and mobility
3-Button Mouse - Get quick access to the media and programs with customizable buttons
Ergonomic Design - Helps you work longer without discomfort
3-Year Warranty - Limited Warranty and Licence Agreement available.

Mini Sneaker Keychains (12 Pack) $3.00

Oh, to be a child again. The innocent carefree bliss that pervaded your rose colored view of the world ... as you juggled curiosity and your imaginary friend Tony ... skipping, playing and running free...


And then you grew up. Responsibilities, stresses, relationships and survival became your comrade or bete noire depending on the period of your life. As you evolved away from holding your parents hands to cross the road, you looked to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles to give you strength and inspiration. Your friends led you into other worlds. Suddenly, you had grown up ... you were invincible .. there were no limits. You could have it all.

Then one day you woke up. Your stuck working a 9-6 job at Corporate Hell. Your favorite part of the day is seeing boo-boo (your wife) when you get home at 8pm after LA traffic causes you to space out to 50 Cents' latest track for the 200th time. You eat dinner, put the kids to sleep, perhaps get some nookie (if it's Wednesday or Sunday) and await your midnight slumber.

You know something is missing. You can't think what it might be. Perhaps it is your childhood dreams that have been put to rest (RIP). You wanted to be a celebrity and learn to dance like Michael Jackson on acid. Now you are 44 years old, starting to sprout grey hair as if someone puts fertilizer on your head everytime you lay down. But all is not lost ... you have some of the most amazing children in the world. Little Sammy has just turned two .. he can walk faster than you and even his dance moves make you smile.

So ... to reconcile your inner banshee ... you decide to embrace Sammy's dreams to be the next dancing queen. He has the unusual behavior of just jumping up and dancing at the most inopportune moments (such as when your boss is proposing to his girlfriend!). Nevertheless, you want him to look at his best and embrace his habit - so you now carry a pair of mini stylish glittery retro sneakers on your keychain ... so he looks cool when he is getting down on his mock dance floor ... let's just hope he wants to be the next John Travolta instead ...

Contents:12 x Mini Retro Sneaker Keyrings (Yes, twelve!)