Tape Measurer with LED Flashlight $4.97

If it were scientifically possible to fit 2 items in 1, the result may actually
split the fabric of the space-time continuum. (In all honesty,
everything I know about the space-time continuum I learned from Back to
the Future.) However, this idea has not hindered the idea and
propagation of 2-in-1 products. What is it about 2-in-1 shampoo
conditioner, Multi-poos, and suicide soft drinks that fascinate our
culture? Convenience? Innovation? Nay, I say that what makes this
idea great, is the idea that the idea of purity is overrated.



Puritanism, the foundation of America has run its course. Just
ask those fringe radical hate groups. Or the teenagers in Wasilla,
Alaska. Innovation cannot sustain itself on the idea of improving the
same item without introducing new ingredients. It's the basic law of
genealogy. Spread the seed. Lord knows I have personally taken this
idea to a new level of perversion. And I have the restraining orders to
prove it. Anyways I digress. Symbiosis between effective agents will
inspire innovation. If only the American car companies and their Unions
would take this to heart. However, with innovation comes the
inevitability of reward. Or in this case, cash. Mo Money Mo problems.



Everything good has been invented. Everything said has been
said better already. Everything written John Grisham has already
published. If you want something new, not necessarily better, start
mixing it up. And therein lies the paradox. Adding 2 old things and
calling them new is an illusion. It's just the convenience and utter
joy of having consumed two or more things at once. This should be our
country's new motto. "America ... consuming two or more things at once."
It should be printed on the flag, right below the Made in China
stamp.



Introducing the awesomeness of two super-convenient tools.
Ever wanted to have a measuring competition with your friend in the
dark? Ever wanted to squeeze a bit more time on the roof to avoid your
family? We have your product.



Product Description



The Protocol 2 in 1 Measuring Tape with LED Flashlight.



16 feet retractable locking steel tape.



Built in 3 LED flashlight



Rugged construction , non-slip grip



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