Saturday, February 5, 2011

Windshield Wonder


When you know what to look for you are sure to find answers for
any questions you might have. I would equate this to a modern age of
palm reading.



First, let's look at the exterior of the car. This examination would
include the make and model of the vehicle. This should be the most
obvious; however, the kind of car someone chooses to drive can be the
most deceptive. If they drive an expensive foreign car the first
expectation would be that the person has a lot of money to invest in a
pricy car. This can be a misnomer in the fact that perhaps they don't
have the money to pay for such a luxury car. Perhaps they are in debt
up to their eyes, and their automobile is an extension of an image they
want to project. A likely symbol of insecurity can be attributed to
this. Then again if the person drives a moderately priced car one would
assume they don't earn much money. This also can be a false judgment
proved to me by the most insightful statement shared to me in my time in
the restaurant business. I would wonder why a person that I knew to
have a mountain of money would tip me so low. It was then explained to
me that the reason they are rich, is because they don't spend their
money. A person with a lot of money will never brag to you about how
much they have.



Second look inside their car to see the shape they keep it in. If it's
in shambles you would asses that the person is lazy and doesn't care if
they are surrounded by trash. However, in another case perhaps the
person is so busy in their day to day life that they literally live out
of their car. Relatively speaking the square footage of the standard
automobile is quite tiny compared to one's dwelling. If most of their
day is spent in the car you can imagine how messy that could get. You
would wonder where keeping your car clean ranks on their hectic
to-do-list of the day. Not to mention if they have kids. Those things
literally vomit trash.



That is just the beginning of the psychology of an individual's car. I
haven't even touched on what bumper stickers and vanity plates are
trying to convey about a person's personality. Politics, sense of
humor, racism, and self-important mumbo jumbo is just the start of the
information people are desperate to exclaim to the world. If you know
how to read the signs literally and figuratively you may be able to peer
into the soul of anyone.



And while you're in there make sure to stock it with the Windshield
Wonder.



Product Description



Makes Cleaning Windshields Fast and Easy!



Cleans and Shines with Plain Water.



Detachable Handle Fits in Glove Box.



Great for Fog and Moisture Removal too!



Pivoting Head with Ergonomic Design.



Includes 16inch Windshield Wonder Handle, Two Microfiber Bonnets, and a
Spray Bottle.



Additional Images



title="Actual View">Actual View

Friday, February 4, 2011

Bendaroos 200 Pieces

As Blaise
Pascal
once observed - the former arrives at its views slowly, but
they are firm and rigid; the latter is endowed with greater flexibility
and applies itself simultaneously to the dive. Ummm yeah.. whatever he
said.

Whenever I think of flexibility - I think of a clip I
once saw on YouTube. Actually, that clip has been embedded deeply into
my memory and was enough of an impetus to cease my couch surfing habits
and join the local class="cloud2">pilates studio (Wednesday evenings - two for one!).
Of course, at this point I merely watch from the wayside. But, it's a
damn good start, I have surmised. href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_2rrxONlLo" class="cloud2">Jump
off that sofa, let's kick it off...

The most flexible mode
of expression is dialogue... so, we will create two disposable
fictitious characters to hopefully (really) function as a stepping stone
to the grand introduction of today's deal of the day ...

Burt:
"So, yeah, it's like Thursday before Christmas, right?"

Ken:
"Yeah yeah course it is... wanna grab a beer to drink in our href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W7fC-zwAA70" class="cloud2">Tampa
Bucs sippy cup on the way to Aunt Bev's famous feast?"

Burt:
"What are we waiting for?"

Ken: "Well.. you're gonna drive,
right?"

Burt: "Right. I mean,
rrrrriiiigggghhhhtttt!!"

Ken: "Let's go you fool..."

Burt:
"I've got my keys you ass..."

Ken: "Don't call me names Mr.
Dogbreath!"

Burt: "Do you wanna go or not?"

Ken: "Of
course.. but I think we need to cover up the logos on our sippy cups to
ensure we don't get caught whilst drinking our Corona beers in the car!
The association with football may give us away as a bunch of
alcoholics..."

Burt: "Good point! What do we do
Ken?"

Ken: "The answer is simple Burt. Flexbility my friend.
Flexibility."

Burt: "Have you been watching late night TV
again?"

Ken: "Yes I have.. and I love it. I saw this product
called Bendaroos! They are amazing bendable sticks that you can mould
to any shape or design! We can cover up our sippy cups with amazing
designs... it will be perfect!"

Burt: "Ken ... you are a ****ing
genius!"

And ladies and gentlemen, that is the end of our
transient storytale... however, we do hope you will continue to read
more about this electrifying product (please note - it will not
literally electrocute you.)...

Product
Description


Bendaroos Mega Pack (200 Pieces) - Amazing
Flexible Building Sticks!

Includes:
200 Zoo Animal Bendaroos
10 Traceable Templates
Simple to use fun guide with step
by step instructions on how to make your favorite
creations.

Magical wax over super strong string. They stick and
stay, then lift away for non-stop play! No glue, no stains, no mess.
Use again and again.

Make Bendaroos do almost anything!
Bendaroos always hold their shape .. plus they even unbend to use again
and again.

Bendaroos stick to walls, windows and can decorate
so many things! There's so much you can do when you play with
Bendaroos!





Additional Images



title="Packaging">Packaging



title="Inside Package">Inside Package



title="Templates">Templates

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Blast Knuckles Shocking High 950,000 Voltage

This patented device has a soft rubber skin and is sized to accommodate
all hand sizes. A safety switch is built in and accessible to your
thumb. Once you grab the Knuckle Blaster stun gun you can flip off the
safety and fire with the same hand. No need to use two hands.



Additional Information


Uses 2 Lithium batteries (included FREE).


FREE leather belt holster designed to allow quick access
and deployment of this amazing stun weapon.


One year warranty.



Note: This item cannot ship to HI, MA, MI, NJ, NY, RI, WI, PA.



Additional Images


Blast Knuckles Alternate View 1

Blast Knuckles Alternate View 2


Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Tomato Topsy Turvey

Is it a badge of honor to measure ourselves with the rest of
our knuckle-dragging Cro-Magnon brethren? I speak only from the male
point of view however; I have been accused of being suspiciously in
touch with my feminine side so hopefully I will be able to tap into the
female mindset as well.



Women want to see a bit of themselves in
us. They want to believe, against all odds that no matter how
disgusting we seem to be, we still share a fraction of their delicate
disposition. Whether it is to pause to absorb the beauty of a freshly
blooming flower, or the ability to reason a $400 price tag on a leather
purse. They want us to understand their insanity. No matter how
fabricated or disingenuous, women want us to be as crazy and
disillusioned as them. What? So it's completely acceptable for us to
fake caring? The answer is yes. They don't care how the cow is
slaughtered, they want the burger.



We do it all the time in our
society. We ignore primal reactions for social conventions. It's the
"don't rock the boat" syndrome. It's wanting to plunge an icepic in
your neighbors face for stealing your paper. It's wanting to call
someone a chocolate covered douche bag for not saying "thank you" whilst
opening the door for them. It's wanting to kick the face of the turd
badger bank teller for closing her stupid little venetian blind
partition to the drive-up window one minute till 6:00.



On a primal level we want to do these things. Anarchy is a fun idea.
Especially for disaffected youth at punk rock shows. We suppress these
reflexes for social convention. That and the fear of spending a few
nights in county. On the same token we feign feelings with the same
vigor as we suppress them. Men ask themselves, "How can I make myself
seem sensitive?" This question is utterly ridiculous. From when I was a
young boy, I was encouraged to follow my heart, and be myself. But that
aint gonna help me. It has been proven over and over again. If you
want to get ahead, get paid, or get lucky, you will have to start being
something that every urge in your body rejects. So if you want to seem
more sensitive, buy this "TOPSEY TURVY" Tomato grower thing.
Imagine the first moment when she notices a mini garden hanging from
your window. It says "wow, this guy likes to garden in a convenient and
easy way." I really want to be naked in his presence
now.



Description



Grow Sweet Tomatoes Right Outside your Door!



Hangs on Deck, Balcony or Patio.



Eliminates Hours of Work and Makes Picking Berries Easy.



Grow Organic Too!



Uses gravity as a vertical growing advantage.



Vertical grow bag heats the plant like a greenhouse so
the root system explodes.



Gravity pulls the water and nutrients
directly to the roots.

Simoniz Fix It Pro


Simoniz Fix-It Pro Clear Coat Applicator is a scratch repair filler and sealer that safely removes scratches from your automotive quickly and easily. It works on any car in three easy steps - apply fix it, buff it in and wipe away. This scratch repair pen is non-toxic, permanent, water-resistant and odorless.



Additional Images



Alternate View


Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Simoniz Fix It Pro


Simoniz Fix-It Pro Clear Coat Applicator is a scratch repair filler and sealer that safely removes scratches from your automotive quickly and easily. It works on any car in three easy steps - apply fix it, buff it in and wipe away. This scratch repair pen is non-toxic, permanent, water-resistant and odorless.



Additional Images



Alternate View


Water Jet Power Washer As Seen On TV

The Water Jet is the amazing all-new hose attachment that rusn your ordinary water hose into a high-power washer.


Remove built-up dirt and mold on wood or aluminium siding and concrete foundations.


Easily wash your car, truck, camper or boat and tackle dirty wheels and rims.


Blast weeds and grime from brick and concrete patios, pool decks and driveways.


Safely reach 2nd story windows and remove wasp nests from a distance.


Bulky pressure washers are expensive, heavy and use gas or electricity. The Water Jet's clever design uses a controlled flow to build a powerful jet stream right from your garden hose. The Water Jet is your easy, economical solution for tough outdoor problems.

Water Jet Power Washer As Seen On TV

The Water Jet is the amazing all-new hose attachment that rusn your ordinary water hose into a high-power washer.


Remove built-up dirt and mold on wood or aluminium siding and concrete foundations.


Easily wash your car, truck, camper or boat and tackle dirty wheels and rims.


Blast weeds and grime from brick and concrete patios, pool decks and driveways.


Safely reach 2nd story windows and remove wasp nests from a distance.


Bulky pressure washers are expensive, heavy and use gas or electricity. The Water Jet's clever design uses a controlled flow to build a powerful jet stream right from your garden hose. The Water Jet is your easy, economical solution for tough outdoor problems.

Water Jet Power Washer As Seen On TV

The Water Jet is the amazing all-new hose attachment that rusn your ordinary water hose into a high-power washer.


Remove built-up dirt and mold on wood or aluminium siding and concrete foundations.


Easily wash your car, truck, camper or boat and tackle dirty wheels and rims.


Blast weeds and grime from brick and concrete patios, pool decks and driveways.


Safely reach 2nd story windows and remove wasp nests from a distance.


Bulky pressure washers are expensive, heavy and use gas or electricity. The Water Jet's clever design uses a controlled flow to build a powerful jet stream right from your garden hose. The Water Jet is your easy, economical solution for tough outdoor problems.

Water Jet Power Washer As Seen On TV

The Water Jet is the amazing all-new hose attachment that rusn your ordinary water hose into a high-power washer.


Remove built-up dirt and mold on wood or aluminium siding and concrete foundations.


Easily wash your car, truck, camper or boat and tackle dirty wheels and rims.


Blast weeds and grime from brick and concrete patios, pool decks and driveways.


Safely reach 2nd story windows and remove wasp nests from a distance.


Bulky pressure washers are expensive, heavy and use gas or electricity. The Water Jet's clever design uses a controlled flow to build a powerful jet stream right from your garden hose. The Water Jet is your easy, economical solution for tough outdoor problems.

Water Jet Power Washer As Seen On TV

The Water Jet is the amazing all-new hose attachment that rusn your ordinary water hose into a high-power washer.


Remove built-up dirt and mold on wood or aluminium siding and concrete foundations.


Easily wash your car, truck, camper or boat and tackle dirty wheels and rims.


Blast weeds and grime from brick and concrete patios, pool decks and driveways.


Safely reach 2nd story windows and remove wasp nests from a distance.


Bulky pressure washers are expensive, heavy and use gas or electricity. The Water Jet's clever design uses a controlled flow to build a powerful jet stream right from your garden hose. The Water Jet is your easy, economical solution for tough outdoor problems.