Circa 2005 after a scrumptious Greek Feast filled with soulvaki I
found a very familiar craving pulling at my sweet tooth. This impulse
was created by the sense memory of a chocolaty, chewy, fresh-baked
treat that I have neutered since early childhood. The All-American
Chocolate Chip Cookie. A desert perfect in every way. Now the
problem a treat coinsure like myself runs into on occasion is the
quality of such items. My feelings towards Chocolate Chip Cookies are
the same I have toward Computer equipment. You get what you pay for.
I have been known to shell out as much as two dollars for one cookie.
On the drive home after making a special trip to an amazing
cookie bakery I have all but devoured three of the six cookies I
purchased. I'm not sure about the rest of you, but I love the idea of
having a sweet treat before I go to bed. My waistline and the women
that don't notice me agree it's most likely a habit I need to quit.
However, for my money it doesn't get better then a sweet desert kiss
before bed.
Flash forward later that night. All of my earthly
business has been accomplished for the day. Only one thing left to do
... Salivating at the anticipation of my midnight addiction I stammer
to my kitchen. I open the cupboard and find my prize. Ripping into
the bag like a child on Christmas morning I don't pause once I feel
the cookie in my mitts. The first of my three cookies are all but
devoured in seconds. Oh the taste, the wincing sweetness, the
unexpected texture. I have missile-lock on cookie number two. One
bite, two bites, gone ... And at last the third cookie has moments
before its demise.
Contemplating the last savory treat in my
hands I become all so aware of a strange sensation enveloping my
hands. It isn't the cold. Perhaps it's my arms awakening after being
leaned after a couple hours on the computer. No that's not it,
because the feeling is strictly isolated to my hand, not my whole arm.
After a moment of bewilderment my next course of action is to inspect
the mystery feeling in a more lit part of the kitchen.
Walking
to the kitchen sink I let my eyes adjust to the bulb illuminating the
one part of the kitchen. Like stepping into the spotlight of some
macabre one man show I look down to see the source of my distress. As
my eyes focus I try to convince myself out of what I'm looking at.
Scurrying with mad frenzy, my hand and wrist is covered with black
ants. Not just a couple of black ants. What could easy add to about
75 microscopic ants, my hands have turned into a pseudo insect mosh
pit.
As I let out a school-girlish whelp I quickly ran my hands
under the now flowing water of the sink. After properly evacuating
the bastards off my hands, I was left with only one question. Now in
retrospect I should have never asked myself this question. Where did
these things come from?
As quick as I asked the question I
immediately wanted to deny what ultimately would be the truth. I
stepped back to the cupboard and looked into the cookie bag with
dramatic flair usually reserved for the most cliche of horror movies.
Yes kids, the cookie bag had about four hundred black ants. At first
I wanted to believe that there might be a chance I could have eaten
two sugar infused treats without ingesting any ants, but common sense
told me better.
I mostly likely consumed five hundred ants in
those first two cookies. How I managed to get them down without
noticing their presence still remains a mystery to me. Lesson
learned, always look at what you're about to eat. Trust me on this
one.
And to protect your open beverages we are proud to present
the Bottle Top.
A plastic adaptor that fastens on top of your
soda can to preserve its integrity.
Helps Avoid Spills.
Fits Most Beverage Cans.
Just Wash and Re-Use.
Keeps Carbonation Longer.
Set of 12 with Assorted Colors.
Additional Images Closeup Packaging
This attractive lipstick case is sure to deceive and ward off potential
This attractive lipstick case is sure to deceive and ward off potential
104" x 56" (264cm x 142cm)
104" x 56" (264cm x 142cm)
This patented device has a soft rubber skin and is sized to accommodate
This patented device has a soft rubber skin and is sized to accommodate
They buzz. They bite. From mosquitoes and horn flies to gnats and
They buzz. They bite. From mosquitoes and horn flies to gnats and
Circa 2005 after a scrumptious Greek Feast filled with soulvaki I
Technology has allowed us to be as self-sufficient as possible. The comforts of living no longer involve
